Special Edition: Cooch Cracks Down!
-5 Attorney General Ken Cuccinelli hands out lapel pins to his staff featuring a modified version of Virginia's state seal — one that uses a breastplate to cover up the exposed bosom of Roman goddess Virtus. But he doesn't stop there. …
+1 Cox Media Group turns alt-rock radio station Y101 into the R&B-leaning, hit-playing Hot 100.9. The Cooch orders that songs must pass through his office for editing. Nelly now sings: “It's getting lukewarm in herrre. So put on some more clothes.”
+3 espite a previous opinion issued by the attorney general, Virginia Commonwealth University reaffirms its nondiscrimination clause, which covers sexual orientation. The Cooch acquiesces, saying he too will protect homosexual employees in his office — at least the “straight-acting” ones.
-4 Also in VCU news, officials announce they'll increase tuition by 24 percent. The Cooch orders 10 percent of the raise to be tithed. To his political action committee. To fight Obama and Satan.
+6 Over the weekend, VMFA stays open late into the night to show off its renovation and expansion to the public. Please — someone, anyone —keep the Cooch away from all those pictures of naked horses.